Meet Mike

There doesn't seem to be a more fitting way of starting a blog about Mike than to use one of his favourite sayings. When he's up to one of his usual mischievous antics of sword fighting with the shoehorn or doing laps around the living room singing to himself, he'll often stop, laugh a little and tell us, "You gotta have fun! You gotta have fun!"

It sounds like a little kid, doesn't it? 

There is no easy way to tell you that Mike is my 63 year old dad and he has Alzheimer's disease.

Mike was officially diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's disease a few years ago and since then our family has seen some ups and downs. It's so odd to think of the contrast I've seen in one person over the last five years. Alzheimer's disease never felt like a legitimate thing that I had to worry about. If someone was forgetful, it was often a line someone would whip out about them having Alzheimer's or 'Old Timers' as I called it growing up.

With Mike, it wasn't very obvious at first. He was working a lot of hours at work, he was under a lot of stress, the plant he was working at was shutting down and he was left to find a new job at a new company. He wasn't having luck finding anything and when he'd tell us about his interviews we'd find ourselves slightly confused about the way he answered questions. He'd been working in the health and safety field for years and yet his answers came out disjointed and confusing. Since then the disease has progressed rapidly. He'll often repeat himself a couple times or he'll trail off about something else in the middle of a sentence. It is almost impossible to follow.

The causes of Alzheimer's are still unknown, as is the cure. There are theories. Was it all the aspartame from the Diet Coke he drank often? Was it stress? Is this hereditary?

As we began noticing changes and realizing what was going on, I had trouble telling people. I realize now with some regret that I was actually kind of embarrassed. There is a stigma associated with mental disease. The stigma doesn't always exist for diseases in other parts of the body. Blame it on my Irish pride I suppose, but to tell someone there was a problem with my dads brain felt like some kind of failure on his part. It seems so silly and ridiculous to think that way, I know. The man, who I'd watched growing up, who seemed capable of anything, had suddenly changed. His wit, his charisma, his way with words, were gone. Maybe it was harder since it was a man who was so young. He was too young. Technically, you're diagnosed with the disease if you're 65 years or older, which is why Mike was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's. I certainly didn't know anyone else in this situation. I knew people who's grandparents had it; but parents? My parent? What do you do when you're 22 and your dad doesnt remember who you are?

 I have to admit I don't talk much about my 'dad'. The man who is my dad has passed on and now Mike has come to stay with us. I think of them separately in my mind. I think its the easiest way I've found to cope.

That said, my purpose isn't to tell you the sadness that comes with Alzheimer's. I have to admit I found a lot of that at the beginning.
Instead, my purpose is to tell you about the happiness. Surprisingly, yes, the happiness and the fun. I absolutely love a man named Mike. And although he drives us all a bit crazy sometimes and of course there are hard parts, which I'm sure I'll allude to at times, Mike makes me laugh and has tapped into a part of my heart that is hard to describe.

I want everyone to meet Mike. I'm sure that just as he's touched my heart and brought a smile to my face, he'll do the same for you and your day.